He Went to Jared--to make everyone else feel like shit.

The folks who brought you the Jared "Galleria of Jewelry" commercials used to be satisfied by just making men feel insecure. You know, some girl gets a chintzy bracelet from her boyfriend and every other woman in the room proceeds to throw a hissy fit and nag, needle, and emasculate their significant others by pointing out that the tool went to Jared. Of course, at that point, every guy would be concerned with exactly two things: 1) getting drunk enough to drown out their woman's bleating; and 2) beating the living crap out of the guy who felt obligated to show them all up. Nonetheless, the point is that the ads were focused only on making men feel stupid.

Not anymore. Now, Jared wants to make single women feel just as worthless by portraying them as shallow, desperate spinsters. Case in point, in the newest Jared commercial, some evil bitch is constantly sending picture messages to her two friends to brag how her guy bought her flowers, took her to Chez Francois, and went to Jared.

First of all, who would do something like that? Why would that smug broad torture her friends by rubbing her hopelessly whipped boyfriend's gifts in their faces? She is basically saying, "Hey, losers, my puppet is bending to my whim and emptying his checkbook for me. Jealous? Good luck picking up truckers at the hotel bar tonight. I'll text you later while he's banging me like a kettle drum. Kisses!!" To end it, the two beaten-down friends text Cruella back and ask her if her man has any brothers. The woman and her husk of a former male then laugh at her friends' sad lives.

Nice. So now the goal is not just to guilt men into buying crappy jewelry for women, but also to belittle single women into wishing they were lucky enough to have a guy to buy it for them. Perhaps Jared's next ad spot will be more compassionate and show a man kicking a kitten.